#reader x joel g

[amphibiahawks321]

I Saw the ENA POST and Can you please make more with Reader dealing with her emotions

[Ena holding Y/N's hand tightly as the loving two skips over(Mostly Ena) practically bouncing with Ena showing her yellow gleaming side]

Ena : Oh my, look at how beautiful today is! It's just perfect! The sky, The things around us and especially the way you smile today just add to it's perfection my pixel prince!

M!Reader : Chuckles... I'm happy cause you're being your adorable self!

[Ena immediately starts holding onto both of Y/N's cheek and starts repeatedly giving him kisses]

Ena : Oh you are just being such a delight! You always made me feel so spectacular!

[Ena basically radiates her happiness around Y/N as she pampers Y/N's face with kisses again, Y/N can't help but laugh at her enthusiasm]

M!Reader : Chuckles... You're so over the top adorable! But really, let's catch a breath–

[Suddenly Ena stops, her yellow glow slowly turning into her blue sad state, she lets go of Y/N's cheek, turns around and starts staring at her own hands]

Ena : Over... The top... What if I'm too much...

[Y/N expression immediately changes, knowing what's happening]

M!Reader : Uh no–

Ena : What if... You get tired of me... WHY HAVEN'T I THOUGHT OF THIS CIRCUMSTANCE BEFORE–

[Y/N starts comforting her from behind, holding one of her hand]

M!Reader : H–Hey Ena, calm down–

Ena : WHAT IF MY CONSTANT ENERGY BECOMES AN ANNOYANCE–

M!Reader : Your energy is what makes me adore you! I wouldn't want you any other way 💧￣ ⁠∧⁠ ￣

[Ena turns around, her blue side starts to fade as the yellow side begins to return again]

M!Reader : There she is!

[Ena's yellow glow finally returns fully]

Ena : Oh you are just the sweetest my pixel prince! You always feel like such a warm pixelated hug that never ends and I get to feel it every single day!

M!Reader : Chuckles... That's—Oof!

[Ena starts hugging Y/N VERY tightly while continuing to kiss Y/N all over his face]

[pukefactory]

Dream BBQ ENA X a reader who is really trying to keep that they're crushing on her HARD under wraps because this isn't their world and ENA's a polygon. ENA catches on IMMEDIATELY and does everything she can to make it so the reader falls even harder

•☽────✧˖°˖ BATTLE AGAINST A WEIRD OPPONENT ˖°˖✧────☾•

★ Summary: A Compilation of Headcanons Featuring Salesperson Ena Trying To Make You Fall Head Over Heels For Her

★ Character(s): Salesperson Ena (Ena: Dream BBQ)

★ Genre: Headcanons, SFW

★ Warning(s): None - Completely Safe!

★ Image Credits: @JoelG

☆ You were doing so well. Keeping your head down, avoiding eye contact, not reacting to her dual-voice tangents. And then she asked, “Do you dream in polygons now?” You choked on your own breath. Ena stared, curious. “Oh dear,” she said sweetly. “Did I corrupt your sleep schedule already?”

☆ Your resolve: ironclad. Your poker face: flawless. Your downfall: Ena leaning too close and whispering, “You’re looking at me like I’m a business deal you’re scared to make.” You dropped the clipboard. She caught it effortlessly. “That was romantic, wasn’t it?” she asked, pleased with herself. “Let me try again later.”

☆ She notices you flinch every time she switches tones, so she starts doing it more. Salesperson voice: “You’re glowing, like someone about to make an investment in destiny.” Meanie voice: “Gross. Get your feelings off the floor before someone slips.” You develop an entirely new kind of anxiety.

☆ You tried to pull away when she touched your hand. “Oh, my apologies,” she said. “Do humans have protocols for heart palpitations caused by interdimensional coworkers?” You sputtered. She took it as a yes and continued holding your hand anyway. “Good. I am now your official stress test.”

☆ She starts narrating your reactions in real time. “Subject’s cheeks are red. Pulse elevated. Avoiding eye contact. Diagnosis: terminal crush,” she says. Then pauses. “How delightful.” You flee the room. She follows. “Is this a chase scene? Should I tackle you with affection?”

☆ You confessed to Froggy in a whisper that you might maybe have a tiny thing for Ena. The she popped out from behind a pillar. “Hello,” she said. “I have overheard and over-processed everything. Let’s start your treatment plan.” It involved exactly zero distance and too much eye contact.

☆ She starts collecting phrases that make you freeze. “Sweetheart.” “Colleague of my soul.” “Irregular heart rhythm.” Each one is weaponized. “Today’s word is… darling,” she hums, and then watches you combust like a cheap firework. “Excellent. I love data.”

☆ You once said “I don’t have feelings for you” and she replied, flatly, “That’s infaccurate.” No elaboration. Just a long, knowing stare and the sound of your denial unraveling like yarn from a cat’s claws. Later, she handed you a sticky note that said “Try again. I’ll wait.”

☆ You can’t even escape her in your dreams. One night, she showed up floating above a candy-colored skyline and whispered, “You can’t hide from the inevitable.” You woke up screaming. She was waiting by your bed with tea. “I monitor the sleep cycle of all my favorites.”

☆ Eventually, you break. You shout at her, spilling out your true feelings. Ena blinks. Then smiles. “Wonderful,” she says, taking your face in her hands. “I like you too. Your agony was delightful. Now we can move into the next phase of emotional entanglement.” You whimper. She beams. “Progress.”

[doinkbunny]

✧₊⁺ THE RED MEANS I LOVE YOU 𝜗𝜚

𑁯 Yandere ENA admiring reader.

ᵎᵎ.˖ꪆ𖠵꒷ Pst! Cherry says: In which you ramble like a kid to ena but she's too distracted admiring to pay attention. This fic was fueled by my absolute adoration with this silly girl, i need her so baddd so i might make another fic like this if this gets enough attention. (There's mlp reference in this btw.)

.ᐟ.ᐟ.ᐟ Warnings: Obsession (duh), possessiveness, Meanie is almost cracking while salesman is on her last thread.

𝜗𝜚 Type: Fluff, romantic, one shot.

｡𖦹°‧ Song: Lovers rock.

"Beautiful, so beautiful," she felt so fuzzy anytime she looked or talked to you.

That's one of the many, many things you were doing to her, and there are so many reasons why. She loved the way your lips moved, the way you'd subtly increase the intensity of your gesticulation whenever you got too excited talking, and even when you would accidentally choke over your own words.

She was head over heels for you. It was quite the exquisite scenario, even: someone making the unforgivable and chaotic ENA grow a feeling or two. And obliviously.

You were sat with ENA near the lake, your hands moving random circles and squares in the air, your feet touching the water subtly with some of your hand movements while you intensely ranted to her, your excited tone never wavering.

And so did Ena's continuous admiration.

As you kept going with your explanation of some type of pony cartoon, Ena couldn't help but admire the way you looked so excited to talk to her, of all people. Most people would have distanced themselves once they heard the rumors about Ena, but you? No, you were different.

And maybe that's why she's so hooked, because you treated her like a human, something visible and with feelings—the bare minimum.

And only God knows how that made her feel good.

You made her feel something she'd never felt before so spontaneously, it was almost soul-bonding, and that's when she immediately knew you two needed to stay close.

To her luck, you actually enjoyed her presence and would often seek it more than she wished for, consequently making her need to see you satiated. That was good.

What was bad, though, were the times she'd have to stay away from you—unwillingly, making her miss you almost immediately.

These times would come so suddenly, and not only because of her stupid jobs from her deplorable job. Sometimes duty calls for you, and then, she'd be forced to just let you go.

While her salesman side was good at hiding her frustration, Meanie was almost combusting from the inside out, forcing Salesman to take control in order to avoid any... mistakes, letting you go so easily but hesitantly.

And once you're gone? That disgusting sensation of longing to feel you once again would fill her quite quickly; that would make any hidden frustration pop out like a balloon under any slight pressure.

Ena can't handle it—she wants you so badly. Your detailed and well-rendered polygons against her badly loaded ones makes her feel so less nauseous.

Gosh, she wishes she could just—

"Ena?" A voice calls out, her name catching the desired attention; hers, shutting down the continuation of her previous thought quickly, her head jerking slightly from on top of her palm that was supporting it before, her eyes landing on the source that called her name.

You.

Her signature smile popped on her face rapidly as once her attention was back to the world outside her thoughts, erasing any trace of possible tension.

"I'm sorry, my dear, I've gotten quite distracted by my own brain. What was the topic of the conversation, again?"

"Oh, nothing, just a silly show about ponies and friendship... What were you thinking about, anyways? You looked pretty deep in thought."

You curiously and somewhat worriedly asked, gaining a different type of endearing smile, a little short laugh, and a light pat on your head from Ena, her eyes closing ever so slightly with the smiling.

"I can assure you it's nothing but some silly reflections. Don't worry your pretty little head."

Word Count: 382

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Since Dream BBQ released I got an idea. Can you do Meanie!ENA x Shy!Fem! Reader where reader is from the human world and works as ENA's salespartner. You can also add teasing/limes if you'd like.

Yay! First Ena request since 2021 (I think lol)

I'll leave out the last part so this is completely sfw

....................

"You know, I'm still impressed that you could understand all these people. Are language barriers just...nonexistent here?"

"Barriers? What a silly prospect, dearest." Ena chuckled as she looked at the list of jobs you were both assigned to carry out. "Let's proceed onwards. Everything we do will bring us one step closer to--turning off that goddamn smoke and giving the Boss a piece of my mind!!"

"Wah!" You jumped back in fright as her "meanie" side started yelling out of the blue, crushing the paper in her grasp.

Having known her for so long, you should be used to this being a daily occurrence...yet somehow she never fails to startle you.

"Did you forget the mission?! This isn't a date!! Put those squishy eyes to work and start looking for that last pet...or baby..or..or whatever!!"

"...y-yes ma'am." Sighing, you tried to shake off your nerves and search for the final trail of blood, not wanting to get her any angrier.

You weren't sure how you winded up together, or how you even got thrown into this strange world in the first place, but Ena was the first to find you. She dragged you into her "business", where you also met Froggy and learned more about what they did.

While you didn't fully understand everything, you knew this much: you've been going around doing favors for people who, for some reason, despised Ena's species. Even if you didn't know what they were saying, their general attitude towards her implies that she did something really, really terrible...or they could be mistaking another Ena's actions for hers.

But you didn't know anything about her past, nor what her kind might've did except exist, though it was through your intervention alone that helped most clients to calm down.

Sometimes, it was difficult for you to speak up given your shy demeanor, which hasn't quite left your personality even now. Although with time it got easier, and Ena helped you come out of that shell more and more.

Of course, you made sure clients fully paid you both for your services--but instead of using cash like you expected, the popular currency here was apparently "chocolates". They were edible, although Ena advised you to hold onto them.

So this was pretty much your new life, and somewhere down the line she became your girlfriend. Her "Salesperson" side loved you dearly and made sure you didn't put yourself in any danger, often speaking on your behalf.

The only problem was getting along with her Meanie side to where her outbursts didn't scare you anymore, and perhaps...you could uncover that bit of softness hiding behind her rough exterior.

That became your mission, and you hoped to make at least a little bit of progress if you're going through all of this trouble to find the Genies and convince them to clear the smoke.

After finding the last pet and bringing it back to Shoryo, you received a handful of chocolates. It was then you realized you've lost track of Ena and searched around the land, eventually finding her near the bridge.

A ratlike person was seemingly guarding it, hoarding different things and looking very alarmed at her presence.

He began yelling in Italian, stomping around and flailing his arms about until suddenly--

He collapsed, fainting much like a goat would when startled. But he stopped moving entirely, and Ena just stared down at him.

"What the hell? I was gone for five minutes!" Mortified, you rushed over and kneeled down. "Sir, can you hear me? Are you-?"

"Don't even tell me you were gonna say "alright". What does it look like?!"

"We have to help him, Ena." Looking up, you saw Meanie's expression remain unchanged, and you sighed. "Please. I know the lost witch probably went over this bridge, but..it feels wrong to cross without his permission."

"....."

"Pretty please?"

"....ugh fine. Let me at him." With a huff, she urged you to move aside while she somehow magically revived the hoarder, who seldom thanked you both and apologized for his outburst.

The stresses of his work were creeping up on him, and apparently he was growing paranoid of the purple villager who stood on a nearby decrepit building, convinced they were scheming to take his "property".

So he tasked--or demanded, rather--that you covered their eyes with something.

Eventually, your aimless wandering led you to a small green alien who was trapped within a bubblegum vending machine with three legs. They were eager to sell you products, but after recognizing Ena, they seemed frightened and insisted they couldn't sell anything to her.

"Okay, now you're being ridiculous." You frowned. "You have something we want, and we're trying to-"

"Guys, guys! Wait!!"

Turning to your girlfriend, you could see Meanie's eyes growing wide--as though she was terrified of something. Her head was spinning, her limbs discombobulating.

It was unlike anything you've seen before. "Ena..?"

"I'M NOT DOING WHAT YOU SAY I'M DOING!!" She yelled out. "I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING!! I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING AT ALL-!"

"Ena! Hey. Hey."

Feeling hands on her shoulders, she suddenly looked at you. Her eyes were still wide, but she had seemingly returned to reality as she calmed down. "[Y/n]?"

"Yeah, it's me." You reassured, moving to take her shaking hands into yours. "You're alright. I believe you."

"........"

Somehow, the vending machine alien was moved by your words, and allowed her to buy one thing and one thing only: mayonnaise that was apparently good for the eyes, but you both knew what to do with it.

Before setting off to complete the hoarder's request, you wandered around a bit to see if anybody else needed help.

But you kept thinking back to Ena's apparent panic attack and stopped for a moment, clearing your throat. "So...um-"

"You heard nothing."

"....did you even know what I was gonna-?"

"Don't back-sass me, sweetheart!" She spun around to face you angrily, fists shaking. "You wanna walk the road alone?!"

"No." You put your hands up in defense. "I'd....much rather walk it with you. Wherever it might lead us, I hope we can face it together."

Meanie blinked, surprised by your words. They sounded so sweet, so endearing...and it made a slight blush rise to that specific side of her face. "Ugh....y-you're lucky you're cute." She grumbled, handing you the paper. "Let's just go find that bug-eyed moron and be done with this."

"Alright." Nodding, you led the way, although occasionally you'd glance back at your girlfriend to see her geometric claws trying to cover up the blush--to no avail. You smiled sweetly, and she just stared at you, the burning sensation getting worse. "You know, you're not too bad, Meanie."

"What did you do to me? Why does my face feel like it's on fire??"

"It's called "being bashful", honey. Humans feel that sometimes, especially around the person they love." You winked.

She just mumbled something unintelligible, her hat hiding her eyes from you, but you both kept continuing forward.

'Huh, there's a way to crack through that exterior after all..'

[dismas-n-dismay]

Business Proposal: You and Ena, in mutual partnership, forever! Do you accept?

[bertieorangy]

ENA : would you still employ me if I was a worm 🥺

Boss!Y/N : I’m currently away, please send “EMERGENCY” if it’s urgent

ENA : EMERGENCY

Boss!Y/N : are you fucking kidding me

[spirit-of-a-kiger]

What if someone were to join either of the ENAs in their weird, random little dances?

Do you think they'd be offended, or would they wanna dance with you?

[decay-1]

Ena imagine 01

Soldier!Ena smirks as she holds you into a dip with one hand.

The other holds a gun, perfectly aimed at an entity’s gut, an entity she couldn’t care less for.

 All she wanted to focus on was you. Only you. 

Looking into your eyes makes her fall in love all over again.

Her eyes soften, and she draws closer, your perfect nose gently brushing against hers. 

She chuckles softly; it was no secret that she was love-sick.

A bang goes off as your lips finally connect.

[rekino2114]

Can you do ENA with prompt 14

Cause i feel like moony would bê The one tô put Ena and Reader together that would bê funny

Moony trying to set up you and ena

Pairing:ena x gn reader

"Dude.....just admit it"

"Admit what my dear friend moony?"

"That you like y/n"

"But of course I do, they are one of my dearest companions"

"......no....I mean like like them"

"What are you implying?"

"I mean you love them"

"Love? You mean that i-"

Ena suddenly glitched and turned bright pink with hearts forming in her eyes

"I want to kiss all over their body and give them so many hugs until we fall asleep in each other arms while whispering declaration of our love"

".........yeah......that"

"Well then you would be correct my dear fellow"

"....for real?"

"Indeed, my adoration for them goes beyond simple friendship and into the realm of what you might call love"

".....then why don't you tell them?"

"W-well-"

She started glitching again this time turning into her classic sad form

"T-they'd never want to date someone like meeeeeeee"

She continued sobbing as moony rolled her eyes at the scene

"I'm so howwible and ugly ans stupid, they deserve way bett-"

"Stop whining already, you're pissing me off!"

"I-i-i'm so sowwwwwyyyy"

"I told you to stop whining! I'm sure y/n is into you too"

"Y-you think so?"

"Yeah, they blush whenever they touch your hand or you bump into each other, they are lovesick too.....ok maybe a little less than you"

"Y-you......y-you"

Ena turned into another one of her forms, this time a bright red one with demon horns and fire in her eyes

"Shut up! Stop giving me hope like that!"

"What? Why?"

"Cause if they don't like me and I confess then I'll look like a fucking idiot and y/n wouldn't want to hang out with me EVER AGAIN!"

"That's.......a bit dramatic"

"YOU'RE DRAMATIC!"

"Just chill out firecracker, I'm sure they like you too"

"Why would I listen to you? Now go away before I punch you"

"Alright calm down, I hate when you're angry"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

"Nothing"

The moon floated away from her friend and continued flying away for a while until she spotted you, so she smirked and decided to approach you

"Oh hey moony how's ena?"

"Makes sense you ask about her"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you're soooooo in love with her"

"W-what?"

"Dude, you can't go 5 minutes around her without blushing and stuttering, I'm surprised you didn't faint yet"

"Fine, fine, ok I love her, what about it?"

"Just wanted to let you know that she said that you could never date her become she's so horrible and ugly and-"

"What? That couldn't be farther from the truth"

"Oh really?"

"Of course not, she's amazing and so pretty and I love all of her personalities and forms and I couldn't imagine........."

You stopped talking when you noticed that a pair of arms had hugged you from behind

"Uh uh, keep going"

".....you did not just-"

The hug got tighter and you turned around to see ena in her lovesick form

"Y/n my dear, is what you said true?"

".....yes"

"Oh heavens, this is a glorious day, I think you're amazing and beautiful too and I love every single little part of you"

"S-so you mean, you wanna be with me....r-romantically?"

"Of course, what else could this mean? Do you accept?"

"Yeah, I'd love to, I love you too ena"

"Splendid"

Without warning, ena got closer to you and kissed your lips. You reciprocated and the kiss went on for a few seconds

"Ew! Do this in private sickos"

"Speaking of, moony did you just set us up?"

"I must agree, you most likely knew I'd follow you, so you decided to make y/n confess their feelings in front of me"

"I-It's not like I did it for you, I was just tired of seeing you two pine for each other and act all mopey"

"Oh my dear friend, I have no idea how I could possibly thank you for this opportunity"

"Yeah, thanks moony, didn't know you could be this nice"

"I told you I didn't do it to be nice-"

"Oh I know, we should have a group hug"

"Wait what? Heck no-"

"Too late, group hug!"

You and ena wrapped the floating moon in your arms making her unable to do anything but sigh while you and your new girlfriend giggled at her

[amphibiahawks321]

[Ena with her usual over the top grin, hands outstretched with a bouquet in hand]

Ena : Oh good evening, my favourite customer! Have you considered the wonders of the experience of a date? Limited time offer! No refunds, but a guarantee of unforgettable memories!

[Y/N raising an eyebrow, amused by the gesture with a smile and a chuckle]

M!Reader : Are you asking me out, or trying to sell me insurance?

[Ena pauses, blinks a few times... Then drops the salesman tone immediately—

Ena : How fucking dense are you?! Yes, I'm asking you out, you think I go around handing out fake coupons and smiles for just anyone? What kind of professional do you take me for, dumbass!

[Y/N still grinning, not even fazed]

M!Reader : Alright, alright I’ll take the deal, One date, no refunds?

[Ena blinks, caught off guard for a split second, Then—her salesman tone is back, bright smile snapping back into place]

Ena : Oh Wonderful choice, My number one customer! You won’t regret it! And, with our limited-time special, you can also enjoy bonus add-ons such as : hand-holding, flirty banter, and... something special that you'll see at the end!

M!Reader : ...is it what I think it is or–

[Ena twitches, immediately drops back to her meanie self, voice raised]

Ena : YES! HOW DUMB ARE YOU?! YES, I WANNA MAKE OUT! I THOUGHT THAT WAS OBVIOUS BY NOW! Matter of fact how about I give the bonus early so I can shut your mouth up!

M!Reader : Pftt–Chuckles... You’re adorable when you’re mad—!!!?!?

[Y/N immediately felt a grip on his clothing by ena's hand–as she immediately push him closer to her making them inches away from touching lips]

Ena : HOW ABOUT I FUCKING KISS YOU SO DAMN HARD YOU FORGET YOUR OWN NAME, HUH?!

M!Reader : ....

M!Reader blushing : L-Lets calm down for a minute...

[pukefactory]

(Absolutely don’t do this if you aren’t comfortable) ENA (Dream bbq) getting drunk with reader?

•☽────✧˖°˖ FIZZY VALLEY ˖°˖✧────☾•

★ Summary: A Compilation of Headcannons Featuring Drunk Salesperson Ena X Reader

★ Character(s): Salesperson Ena (Ena: Dream BBQ)

★ Genre: Headcanons, SFW

★ Warning(s): Mentions And Descriptions Of Alcohol

★ Image Credits: @JoelG

☆ You should’ve known something was off when Ena invited you to what she called “a high-stakes engagement strategy brainstorm over beverages.” You were picturing coffee. Not tequila. Not her slamming two shot glasses on the bar and declaring, “Let’s reframe the concept of reality, darling.” She drinks like it’s a performance review���firm eye contact, exaggerated praise, and PowerPoint levels of misplaced confidence.

☆ Once Ena’s a few drinks in, her Salesperson side becomes so aggressively charming it’s like being smothered in coupon codes. “If you subscribe to this partnership now, I’ll offer you unlimited emotional support and complimentary hand-holding,” she hums, voice like cherry soda and half-suppressed giggles. You try to hide your flustered expression. She sees it. She logs it as “high conversion potential.”

☆ Her Meanie side doesn’t come out often at first—until she tries to order fries, but the kitchen’s closed. Suddenly she’s slamming her forehead on the bar, sobbing, “I AM THE TRAGIC EMBODIMENT OF CORPORATE WASTE—WHERE’S MY SALTED PRODUCTIVITY?!” You offer her a peanut. She throws the bowl at a breathing taxidermy moose.

☆ “Here’s your performance feedback,” she slurs, twirling a swizzle stick like a laser pointer, “You’re hot. You show initiative. You opened a door for me once. I will die for you.” You tell her that’s not how feedback works. She pulls out a clipboard from her suspenders and tries to make you sign a form titled “Love Contract (Beta).”

☆ She draws gimmicks on napkins. Terrible ones. Drunk ideas like “emotionally sentient office chairs” and “a pyramid scheme where everyone sells little hats.” You try to say “maybe we shouldn’t do this.” She claps a hand on your back like a frat bro and shouts, “WRONG ATTITUDE, PARTNER. THINK BIGGER.” Then she draws a diagram that’s just the word “VIBES” in a circle.

☆ She stares at you for a full minute, eyes glassy, voice flat: “Are you in the mood for shared assets and mutual annihilation, or should I put on my mask again and pretend not to like you?” You blink. She blinks. Her red side winks. You are either about to get kissed or yelled at. Or both. Probably both.

☆ The bar has one of those ancient karaoke machines. She picks a glitchy jazz remix of the Windows 95 startup sound. Halfway through she forgets the words (there are no words) and starts yelling improvised business jargon in rhythm. “Synergize my dividends, baby! Let’s OUTSOURCE THE PAIN!” Someone in the back cheers. You cry.

☆ Her Salesperson side leans over the counter, cheeks flushed, voice soft and too sincere: “Do you think people like me more when I smile? I’ve been smiling all night. It hurts now. But I—I want to be liked. I want you to like me. For me. Even if I mess up the pitch.” And her Meanie side chimes in: “GØD, I hate being real.”

☆ You’re not sure what triggered it—maybe someone said “quarterly”—but suddenly she’s sobbing into your shoulder like a malfunctioning LinkedIn ad. “I DIDN’T ASK TO BE A PRODUCT OF CAPITALISM! I just wanted to sell fruit. Or stickers! Or happiness! But now I’m selling ME!” You rub her back. She hiccups and asks if you’d still like her if she was “just a weird triangle girl with debt.”

☆ The bar’s quiet now. Her hat’s fallen off. You’re holding her upright and she’s murmuring nonsense like, “Let’s invest in each other’s feelings… diversify the pain into smaller dividends… I’ll build a company out of your laugh…” Then, barely audible: “You’re my best client. Don’t ever unsubscribe.” You smile. You don’t say anything. You just let her rest.

[satori-runa]

—Under Terms and Service

Summary: Ena and you embark on a business based dinner date!

Tags: ooc, not proof read, romance, comedy

Words: 0,7k

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

Ena glanced at you. You glanced back.

"A contract?" you asked, raising a brow.

Ena nodded, her signature smile lighting up her face, charming, surreal, and just a little bit unsettling in the way only Ena could be. “Absolutely! To cover the points under the terms and service document and make sure that both sides are compensated. Someone like you, a fellow smart mind, would understand how business goes, right?” she said smoothly, holding up a piece of paper and pointing at the blank line meant for your signature.

You sighed, but you couldn’t help the amused smile tugging at your lips. “Well, I guess it's needed.” Your eyes flicked to the line of people growing outside your favorite restaurant. It was couples’ discount night—one you’d been looking forward to—but you had to find a date, even if it's fake. That's when Ena, ever the business opportunist , offered to step in as your pretend girlfriend.

All it took was a signature, and just like that, Ena was officially your partner for the night.

As you both reached the front of the line, the person at the entrance gave you a long, skeptical look. Maybe they sensed something was off. Maybe they saw right through your little charade.

But before you could even open your mouth, Ena stepped forward with theatrical flair.

“HOW DARE YOU TO ASSUME THAT I'M NOT ABSOLUTELY MADLY IN LOVE WITH THEM?!” she shouted, voice shaking with raw, chaotic emotion. “A LONELY MAGGOT LIKE YOU COULDN'T GRASP MY AFFECTION FOR MY PARTNER!”

The poor host flinched hard, eyes wide. Ena wasn’t joking, and if she was, she sold it terrifyingly well.

“I love my partner very much,” she added with a proud huff, her voice smooth like honey, “more than any paid vacation days.”

And with that, she grabbed your hand, smiling sweetly as if the outburst hadn’t just shattered the restaurant’s vibe like a thrown plate. You had no choice but to go along, blushing and trying not to laugh too hard.

Dinner was… intense.

The moment you sat down, Ena adjusted her seat like it was a throne. Her smile returned, bright and poised. “This is delightful, isn’t it? The ambiance, the lighting, perfect for a romantic evening between two… committed individuals.” She leaned forward just enough to bat her lashes at you. “And remember, any additional sides are covered under subsection 4-B of our temporary partnership clause.”

You blinked. “There’s a subsection?”

“There is now,” she grinned, sipping from her water like it was vintage wine.

The waiter approached, just barely

masking his discomfort. “And for the couple tonight, have you decided—?”

“ONLY THE MOST EXPENSIVE AND BEST OF COURSE!” Ena snapped. The waiter flinched.

You tried to intervene. “Actually, maybe something in the middle rang—”

“Silence, darling.” Ena turned her head dramatically toward you, voice low and venomously sweet. “Your opinions are valued, but we agreed, I am leading this date. Article 2, remember?” Her smile was the kind that made the hairs on your neck stand up.

But a beat later, she laughed and winked at the server. “Kidding! Just kidding. We’ll go with two of the set menus, please. Perfect for lovers, right? Because we’re so deeply in love and compatible and emotionally entangled.” Her tone dripped with sugar.

The waiter fled. Probably for his life.

You leaned in. “Are you trying to scare everyone into thinking we’re real?”

“I’m trying to win,” Ena whispered back. “There’s no prize, but I like winning anyway.”

Throughout dinner, her personalities flicked like a light switch. One moment she was feeding you a bite of bread and cooing, “Oh, open up, my sweet tax deduction~” and the next, she was glaring daggers at a passing couple. “If they look at us like that again, I smack their heads inside their soup.”

You weren’t sure if you should be afraid or impressed.

Probably both.

Midway through dessert, Ena leaned back in her seat with a satisfied hum, fingers interlocked behind her head. “This was a good idea. You get food, I get emotional dominance, and together, we get a 30% discount.”

You tried not to laugh. “So this is just business to you?”

She turned to you with a completely straight face. “Absolutely. Unless, of course…” Her eyes narrowed dangerously. “You’ve caught feelings, haven’t you?”

You nearly choked on your drink.

Ena burst into a delighted laugh, her eyes glitching slightly in color and shape. “Relax, I’m only teasing. Probably. Maybe. Contractually, I’m not allowed to say.”

You stared at her. “...You are chaos.”

“I am your girlfriend,” she corrected with a wicked grin. “At least until the check comes.

[realangelahernandez]

When he’s written by Lana del Rey

[bajablastwrites]

Random ENA Headcannons I Thought About

ENA x reader

Summary: a few headcannons mainly focused on human biology and anatomy, but there’s other topics sprinkled in as well

Author’s Note: I like the idea that ENA would be fascinated with how humans work since, you know. She’s not human, and probably thinks you’re the weird one in her world.

————————————————————————

⁃ Honestly, she probably thinks you’re really really weird appearance wise. You quickly form an attachment to her since she’s pretty much your guide when it comes to navigating her world. She’d definitely be fascinated with your hair, since it’s not a single solid piece resting on top of your head. Whether you let her mess around with your hair is up to you.

⁃ Your body is a constant topic of interest to her, in comparison to her solid polygon body, yours is soft, smooth and squishy. So she’s constantly squishing and poking at your body. Though, you have to establish what is and isn’t appropriate for her to touch— without your permission at least.

⁃ You quickly learned that chocolat (chocolate) was actually a form of currency when ENA lost her mind watching you pretty much eat her money. After Meanie finished screaming at you for eating her hard earned money, while trying to force your mouth open in an attempt to get her money back— you immediately apologized and explained to her that chocolate is simply a tasty sweet to munch on where you come from. It’s the first recognizable food you saw in her world and assumed it was made with the intend to be eaten. She seemed to calm down a bit once she processed that you didn’t eat her coins out of malice, she actually found your form of currency to be the weird. Paper and metal? As currency to pay for goods and services? How odd. After clearing the misunderstanding up, she put you to work because she still wants her money back. Which is fair enough.

⁃ She doesn’t understand the concept of eating since we never see any entities actually eat, except when they’re transporting ENA to a new environment. She doesn’t seem to need to eat either, so the idea of putting something in your mouth and swallowing it being a very essential part of your survival was a concept she was very unfamiliar with. But if it means her new coworker gets to stay by her side and not eat her money, she’ll find something that can be deemed as edible based on your description on what you consider to be food.

⁃ ENA loves to watch you eat. That’s it, she just likes to watch you eat. It’s very fascinating to her, watching you chew and swallow something she brought you makes her happy. To her It feels like she’s contributing to your survival (which she is), so she’ll just stare at you the entire time you’re eating. Will it make you nervous? Yes. Will she stop if you ask her to? No. She can’t eat (as far as we know) so she can’t experience that for herself, so she watches you eat instead.

⁃ “Can you stop staring at me?” You awkwardly asked. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to decline your request, my dearest work partner. I’m currently witnessing two business assets merging together, it’s a momentous occasion that I have to witness for myself!” She leaned forward eagerly, invading your personal space and coaxing the odd looking sandwich you were holding towards your mouth. Her meanie side quickly growing impatient at your hesitance to eat under her gaze and shoving the meal into your mouth. “HURRY UP AND CHEW THE STUPID SANDWICH ALREADY!!”

⁃ Sleep is also a strange concept to her, but it’s at least something you can try and teach her to do. Though, you’ll probably have to pitch it to her like paid business expense, a promotional reward or as a business tax write off if you want her to take a nap with you. She’s seen other entities and creatures nap and sleep, so it’s not something new to her. It’s just that ENA doesn’t need sleep so she doesn’t do it, but you do so it’s not uncommon for you to wake up, only to see her inches away from your face. She tries not to disturb you while you’re asleep, but you waking up because you can feel her staring at you is both alarming to her as it is interesting.

⁃ If by chance ENA manages to read up on humans to learn more about you and how your body works, she’s going to be asking you a lot of questions or observe you more to see if what she read was true. Not only does she want to learn about you as a species, but it’s also her way of showing that she cares about you as well. It’s basically the “trying to bond with my male cat, but idk what men like so I took him to Home Depot.” Meme.

⁃ She didn’t know what you liked to do for fun so she took you to “hunt and gather” with her💀

⁃ ENA later learned what you actually like to do for fun and you guys do that instead during the rare occasions she has free time.

⁃ Your biology fascinates her, she wants to know everything about it. If you let her, she’ll run her hands over your body in order to feel your bones and joints— basically giving you a physical exam out of curiosity. When she learns about human reproductive organs she’s practically fixated on you. The concept that you can create a new life form with your body is truly fascinating to her.

⁃ “You mean to say that you have an organ with the ability to create new life inside your body is verifiably true?” ENA asked with curiosity, anticipating conformation of this new information she learned about. “Uh, yeah, why do you ask?” Mildly confused at her sudden question. “Amazing! Truly splendid, a self sufficient entrepreneur with an amazing asset full of endless potential and possibilities!” Her salesman side praised.

- It doesn’t matter to her if other humans are also capable of doing the same thing, what matters to her is that you have the capacity to do so. She’s fascinated with you and you only, you’re the only human here after all. Humans are interesting to her because you’re interesting to her.

[morgan-va]

Ena x G/N Reader HCs: An Ode To Isekai (Or, How You Destroy Her and Moony’s Sandwiches)

One moment, you were choking on a pickle that the employee at your favorite fast food restaurant neglected to remove. The next, you were plummeting through a swirling mess of distorted colors, shapes shifting around you like a broken computer screen. Gravity twisted in ways it shouldn’t, and just when you thought you’d keep falling forever—

THUD.

“AAAH! OUR BEAUTIFUL, PEACEFUL PICNIC! DESTROYED! TRAGEDY! WOE IS ME!”

The voice was loud, dramatic, and oddly robotic, and as you groaned, struggling to push yourself up, you realized you’d landed right on top of a checkered picnic blanket… and two figures. One was an angular, multi-colored humanoid flailing her arms wildly, and the other was a round, moon-faced being staring blankly at you.

The nausea was instant. The sky was glitching, the grass beneath you was pixelated, and the entire world meshed together with low-poly graphics. Panic clawed at your chest.

“Oh! How fascinating! A new specimen! A new friend! A LOST SOUL!” The colorful girl’s tone flipped in an instant, her arms outstretched as if you were some grand discovery.

You barely had time to react before she yanked you upright with alarming strength. “Salutations! My name is Ena! And you are…?”

ENA is immediately, intensely curious about you. One second she’s mourning the loss of her sandwiches, the next she’s staring at you with her face way too close to yours, inspecting you like you’re some rare artifact.

“How peculiar! You have skin! And your eyes—so full of FEAR and EXISTENTIAL DREAD! Adorable!”

The one apparently named Moony, still sitting on the ground, tilts her head. “You look sick. Don’t vomit on my blanket.”

You do, in fact, feel sick. The ground beneath you doesn’t feel real, and the sky keeps shifting between daytime and nighttime. Your body feels out of place in this world.

“Oh nyo, my new chum is feewing siwck :c dis is allll my fauwlt” Ena cries, polygonal tears falling out of her eyes and literally bouncing off of you. However, she notices your shaky breathing, and she seems to pause her breakdown. Then her tone shifts into something oddly clinical. “Ah. I see. Overwhelmed. Confused. Rapid heart rate. Nausea. Ah, yes. Yes yes yes. Yes yes. Expected results.”

“Do not worry, my fleshy, fragile companion! I, Ena, shall teach you the ways of this realm! Perhaps you shall THRIVE! Or perish horribly. But no! I shall ensure your survival! HOPEFULMISTICALLY!”

She switches between exaggerated theatrics and cold, matter-of-fact, and often bizarre statements at random, which does not help your anxiety.

At first, her advice isn’t very helpful, or well, maybe it is, at this point you aren’t sure of anything anymore. “Do not drink the water from the drinking fountains. Or do. It might turn you into a dog. Or erase your mouth. It’s a gamble! And you know what God says about that!”

Eventually, though, she starts learning how to help in a more… normal way. She slows down when she notices you trembling, and after a long pause, she mutters, “You feel like you don’t belong here, don’t you?”

It’s the first time her voice sounds completely even. No wild swing, no emotional outburst, Just quiet understanding, as if both of her sides are coequal in their understanding.

She places a hand on your shoulder. “I know that feeling. I still feel that way, most of the time.”

��But,” she continues, suddenly perking up, her yellow side taking control again, “I have ADAPTED! And so can you!”

You’re not entirely convinced. But the way she begins doing a strange dance around you like you’ve already won something makes it hard to stay hopeless.

“Besides! You have me now! A trusty, glorious, questionably competent guide! Let us find you STABILITY! Or at least, a divine snack.”

Moony finally chimes in again. “... You still crushed my sandwich.”

Ena gasps. “And a REPLACEMENT SANDWICH! Quickly, to the food vendor! Or the wishing well! Maybe we’ll be lucky and summon a perfect BLT (Barely Legible Tomato) from the void!”

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Could you do a ENA DREAM BBG short with Reader busting a gut at the Shaman's "go away Ena, and get a life" statement, while Ena is unamused?

"Now...go away, Ena! And get a LIFE!! That shall be your quest for today!!" The Shaman declared, his hands waving around wildly before he vanished back into the machine he came from.

You and Ena stood there for a brief moment, with her staring into the glowing pink pool surrounding the contraption, wondering what this "life" was and how she could acquire it.

But you, on the other hand, couldn't help but crack up.

Hearing the odd sound that left your lips--one that you were desperately trying yet failing to conceal--she turned her head to you, confusion and concern displayed on her face in equal measure.

"Did he just tell you to get a life??? Oh my god--that's.....I'm sorry--" You began laughing hysterically, damn near keeling over as you held your stomach. "That's INSANE. "Get a life"! God, I can't breathe--oh, man.."

"I'm not qualified in CPR training, so please continue breathing..for both our sakes." Ena muttered, unamused as she stood there awkwardly. "Tell me...what was so funny about his request?"

Once you were able to catch your breath, you looked at her, still trying to hold back your giggles. "O-Oh. I forgot..uh..."get a life" is another human idiom. I'll tell you about that one later." You coughed into your fist, finally managing to settle down and not look like a crazy person anymore. "Whew...I'm okay now. Looks like we need to find something he can use to create life. Maybe the witches know a thing or two about that practice. Let's visit them next."

"What insight you have, my friend!" Her Salesperson side grinned. "Let's go check off that box, shall we? And you can enlighten me on this idiom along the way. You're like an endless well of knowledge, and I crave more understanding!"

You weren't sure what to say to that, but it sounded like a compliment, so you just nodded and followed her out of the Seal House.

In less than ten seconds, you've explained the idiom to her. Somehow she manifested a pen and paper from her suspenders, taking long detailed notes about how and when she should appropriately use it--only to throw them away as you approached your next client.

Apparently, her Meanie side didn't like the way she was being spoken to, despite them only saying all but two words to her.

And that was enough for her to draw out the megaphone.

"AT LEAST WE'RE CONTRIBUTING SOMETHING TO SOCIETY!! STOP COMPLAINING AND GET A LIFE, MORON!!"

Once again, you find it difficult to contain your laughter, tears coming to your eyes.

You've trained her well.